Throw the Paint on the Canvas

I’ve mentioned my music before, but art is another very early passion that I let fall by the wayside... 

I don’t know if you know if you guys know this about me, but I was voted the best artist in my classroom in elementary school!...Seriously though, I used to be pretty good growing up, and I kept busy with art classes all the way up til college. But then I slowly abandoned my skills over time as I focused on other things. (And as I saw people that were way better than me, including my ridiculously talented artistic sister!) 

 So I stepped back. And as many years passed without a single class or practice, I eventually convinced myself that my own talent was lost...

Fact: I have a beautiful art easel set a friend gave me for my birthday forever ago...that I have never used. Someone else saw the potential in me, heard my longing and wishing I could draw and paint again, and gave me an incredible gift to encourage me.

But despite that fact, I never even took it out of the box for years. I'm pretty sure I made more than one move, dragging that huge heavy sealed thing along with me. But then one glorious day, I actually opened the box, and the easel FINALLY moved from the back of my closet to my actual living space. (you know, progress!) Where I thought I might use it if I saw it regularly.

...And it still stands there just as cute as can be, over a year later, with the same blank canvas sitting on it.

Its not like I’m missing anything that I need to actually use it.

 I mean the gift was an entire art and painting KIT.  I have the paints, the brushes, the canvas, the easel as tall as I am, even a real wood artists palette for all of my paints, (so you know I’m legit) and I can really do this thing right. I have all the tools, absolutely everything that I could possibly need to make this happen and yet..for some reason it just hasn’t.

"Should i paint this? Hmmm should I paint that? But I'll make a mess...I really don't want to waste the canvas... Besides this is not a priority. (It's never a priority) I'm not sure what I want to paint. And then I'll be stuck with it. I'm worried what I might create..I don't think I actually have the talent anymore or know what I'm doing. I don't want to it to be WRONG and besides I really don't have the time for this anyway.. Nah, there's other things more important...”

This sums up my whole creative process and (pun not originally, but now totally intended) it's not a pretty picture!! 

Because every time I notice this blank white canvas, it’s a subtle reminder of everything else I’m not creating..

And that really needs to stop now. 

There’s a reason I keep coming back to the phrase “Throw the Paint on the Canvas” as my motto and the theme of this site. Because it’s the only way I get anything done.

Seriously.

Because left to my own devices and my overthinking tendencies, I can spin and get lost in way too many ideas and options, and directions (feeling really overwhelmed) with little focus or follow through.

And this canvas is the perfect example.

So “Throw the paint” is a simple phrase that helps me get out of my own head and all the self sabotoge that goes on there, and take imperfect action. It is my permission to just go for it, to do my best with what I have and let go of the result. To keep it really simple and trust that it’s good enough.

Now, this is NOT the same as throwing spaghetti against the wall and seeing if it sticks!

Spaghetti is spaghetti and I really don’t think you want a marinara stain on your wall!

We are talking about still having a target, like the canvas, and choosing YOUR inspired colors with care, but then letting go of the result, hurling that paint through the air and trusting those colors to land and create something beautiful.

Throwing the paint is about not feeling ready and trying it anyway. Having a target but letting go of how it happens or if it’s perfect and just TRYING and trusting your colors. Period. Just putting it out there and hurling paint on the canvas, letting go of the outcome. 

This concept also works way better for me in terms of goal setting and planning. Because instead of worrying excessively and trying to pinpoint a super specific goal in the future that I really can’t even see yet, I’m just following my overall vision and trusting, taking those steps forward, instead of stopping or second guessing myself. 

Because throwing the paint is the opposite of overthinking, or giving into your fears. You are NOT waiting around to figure it out. You are taking action before you’re ready and that brings clarity. So what if you don’t know exactly what your end goal is or creation is? You have an idea though, some kind of vision, and that’s enough to get started. Start to throw the paint and the clarity will come.

Despite knowing this to be true, I have to still constantly remind myself.

And I think there is something bigger at work here than all the overwhelm, overthinking, perfectionism, etc . Because those are just the underlying annoying symptoms of these deeper fears.  For me, it comes down to a lack of control that feels like the biggest fear of all. What's more out of control then throwing your colors out there?? Throw the paint on the canvas embodies everything you are scared or hesitant to do (because deep down it’s exciting!) It embodies breaking every obstacle that you’ve put in your way. It's doing. It's not overthinking. It's embracing your creativity and colors and throwing them out in the world! It is trust and freedom, art, and pure expression.

Just like when you were a little kid. Think about how freely you created!

So…. as a reminder, I know it’s finally time to put this into practice and literally throw paint at that blank canvas that’s been sitting around my appartment, waiting for me to do so. I will just let go and make a mess, and let the brush strokes do whatever they want. Just create.

And before I post this, I will take a shot of my imperfect creation and share it below!

Now it’s your turn! In what simple way could you take a step to start something imperfectly, and let those colors fly?? Knowing you can always perfect your brush strokes later. :)

I can’t wait to see what you create!

No more blank canvas!!

Throw that  paint!

Love, Laurel